


Nine Years, Nine Lives

by MiniNoire



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Angst and Feels, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Suicide, References to Depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-18
Updated: 2020-03-18
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:40:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,972
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23203360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiniNoire/pseuds/MiniNoire
Summary: They say a Ladybug lives short and lucky, the black cat grieves her parting for nine lives. She takes her last breath, happily, in his arms, and he takes his last breath, gloomily, in his memories of her.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir/Marinette Dupain-Cheng | Ladybug
Comments: 22
Kudos: 91





	Nine Years, Nine Lives

**Author's Note:**

> Neither owning the fandom, nor the characters. Just the plot. Edited and republished. Thanks to the constructive criticism, kudos and comments received!! Appreciate it all <3
> 
> First fanfic, hope you all enjoy! Kudos to the members of the discord server!! 
> 
> Mininoire scat ;-)
> 
> 18/08/2020: Since I am bored and technically on hiatus, why not update the story? Unanswered questions (hopefully) addressed, and formatting done proper this time!

_Dark clouds loomed overhead, the sharp flashes of thunder and the melodious pitter- patter of the rain surrounding them, as bluebell met emerald green, and something new, something miraculous blossomed in the air...._

A sharp knock broke the boy’s train of thoughts. He quickly composed himself and put on his best smile. Years of modelling sure had their benefits.

“Adrien. Breakfast is ready downstairs.” Natalie said in her usual monotone, her eyes fixed on her tablet.

“I will be joining in a minute. Just need to get some stuff together. And uhh…”

“Your schedule for today has been cleared. Uh. Are you sure you are fine, Adrien?"

“Natalie, I won’t repeat myself time and again. I am fine.” The boy pinched his nose, sighing in exasperation as he left the room.

The old father-son picture in the hallway was now replaced by the happy family portrait of three. But, the blonde couldn’t find it in himself to smile. The portrait lacked something, or rather, a special someone.

“Adrien!”

A pair of slender yet strong hands hugged him from behind.

“Morning Mom.” The boy returned with a small smile.

“How are you feeling, honey?”

“Better. I guess.” His eyes flitted back to the portrait, as he subconsciously fiddled with his right ring finger, where some long time ago, a metal band had existed.

Emilie wrapped a comforting arm around her son, knowing all but saying nothing. Not that she had the courage to say anything in the first place. They both stayed like that for a moment or two, then Adrien broke the silence.

"Agreste men care a lot about their women, don't they, Maman? That they would go to any lengths for their love for them?"

He felt her stiffen, and that was enough to give him his answer.

"Even if it means ruining someone else's family."

Emilie didn't say anything.

“Father must be waiting. We should go.”

The voice, it wasn’t that of her carefree sunshine child. No. The monotonous voice belonged to the 29 year old man now standing beside her, a man whom she had given birth to but sometimes knew next to nothing about.

Breakfast took place in a tensed silence. Adrien continued to pick on his food as his parents watched in concern.

“Is something the matter, son?” Gabriel asked, his voice laced with concern.

Adrien looked up, and Gabriel could bet his entire fashion empire on the fact that he still saw the raw emotions in those eyes that he saw in them on that fateful day, nine years ago.

“Doesn’t concern _you_ , Father.”

Breaking the stare, the young Agreste got up. “I don’t feel like eating. Maybe some fresh air would help. I will be back soon.”

“Take your bodyguard with you.”

“Father, please. Not like I have any crazed fans now that I happily left that modelling career years ago. And plus, I am a big man now. I can take care of myself! I don’t need a freaking bodyguard to assist me everywhere!”

“But you are an Agreste. You are my son! The world out there is still dangerous for you.”

That was the wrong thing to say. Yep, it surely was. For Adrien’s eyes suddenly narrowed as he spoke in the coldest voice Gabriel ever heard.

“Do I need to remind you of the situation 15 years ago? How some crazy psychopath troubled the entire city for his own selfish needs and how I used to battle him? Risk my life daily?” The boy laughed mirthlessly, ”When my own blood can put me in danger every single day, why should I care for what the outsiders might do? Tell me Father, TELL ME!”  
  


But Gabriel was silent. He couldn’t find the words, or maybe the strength to contradict those words.

The boy stalked towards the door, pulling it open. Stepping out, he cast one last scathing glance at the ex-supervillain as he spoke, “And for the last time, I am NOT your son, Gabriel Agreste. Because you and I both know what happened to him, nine years ago.”

* * *

Walking down the streets, it felt like he was having a walk down the memory lane.

Paris was adorned in all her glory with red, black and green colors. Today was a day of celebration, a day of liberation. A day that promised hope, that no matter how long the fight lasts, no matter the costs, good will always win over the evil.

The costs…. The blonde couldn’t help but sigh.

His feet automatically took him to the park near his old school. Looking around, Adrien could still find the merry-go-round, the old fountain, the statue…..

…It was beautifully decorated. Flowers, gifts, notes of thanks for the cat-bug duo littered the premises near it. People were flocking around, clicking selfies, writing appreciation notes, placing flowers. Children merrily cosplaying and fawning over the red, black and green balloons.

He still remembered, how the unveiling happened, and his stupid boasting of being Ladybug’s special cat to that sculptor…Theo was his name? Maybe. Plagg had teased him days still end about the “special promise” Ladybug had talked to Copycat about…..

…special promise….

_“You and me against the world, milady?”  
“Forever and always, mon chaton.”_

A tug broke the man out of his thoughts. He looked down, to find a little girl, aged five maybe, dressed up in the cutest Chat Noir costume and looking at him with her big bluebell eyes.

Only Ladybug knew how much blue was his favourite colour.

“Yes?”

“Uhm, kind sir, I am unable to find a Ladybug for a pic. Can you be my Ladybug please?”

For a moment, he was caught off-guard. Chat Noir and Ladybug had never revealed their identities to anyone. Ladybug was lost in the battle and Chat Noir? 

_"Destruction is meaningless without Creation, Chat Noir is meaningless without Ladybug."_

Those were the hero's final words, before he simply disappeared from the public eye.

No one had ever sighted any hero of the Lucky Duo patrolling the city.

And that was when the loss of an unknown comfort was known to all.

"Sir?"

The kitty eyes combined with the kitty costume… Adrien couldn’t help but laugh genuinely. Geez, only another bluebell could have had this effect on her.

“Sure, my Kitty Noir, why not? I can’t be your Ladybug, because of the gender issues,” the girl giggled as he comically pointed at himself,” but I can be your Mister Bug.”, he added with a wink.

“OOOOH! Mister bug!!! Does that make me the ultra-charming Lady Noir?”, the girl asked, doing a hair flip.

“Sure Milady, why not?”, the petname rolled from his tongue with such surprising ease that he himself was shocked. And no matter how much he tried, but he couldn’t ignore the bittersweet taste that accompanied it.

Adrien picked the girl up and put on the Ladybug mask (her mask, his mind supplied) that she gave him. The duo took a set of goofy pictures, all the while the girl happily giggling and trying to put up the best cool “Chat Noir” act.

“Thank You so much Monsieur, Emma won’t give up until she had had her pics.” The girl’s mother said.

“No worries at all, Madame. She sure is a sweet bundle of joy. Reminds me of someone with her bubbly nature.”

“Ah! I see. I wish the best future for you two.”

“Thank you. She means the world to me. And yeah, I look forward to our future.” The blonde smiled happily.

“Sir, keep this as a gift from me for your lady, please?” the girl smiled.

Adrien squatted down, ruffling her blonde hair. “I sure will, Purr-incess. She would love it, I know.”

* * *

Standing outside the patisserie, Adrien debated with himself. Should he? Should he not? With a sigh, he pushed the door open.

The bell chime informed the owners of a new customer, and took the customer down another memory lane.

_“_ _One passion fruit macroon box set coming right up!”_

_"I wonder, are you on the menu for today, Purr-incess?”  
_

_“MEEPP! Me- menu- yeah! Why not? I MEAN!! Not like I am on the menu- NAHHHH- The menu’s on me!! Wait….I MEAN!! The treats!! They are on me! As in not on me, but the house, like in the house, but treats on house and uhhhh - YOU GET WHAT I MEANNNNNN!!!”_

“Adrien? Is that you?”

  
Before the man could reply, he was wrapped up in a massive bear hug. “My boy!! Long time no see!”

“Nice to meet you too, Mr. Dupain.”

“Just Tom, young man. And oh my, look Sabine! How fit he has become!”

The petite woman came up, pinching his cheeks. Adrien noticed her graying blue-black hair… these nine years, yet she still looked so sweet, so homely, so motherly.

“He sure has become healthy Tom. Now run upstairs child, there are some people you wanna meet!”, the Asian woman winked.

People he wanna meet?

He walked upstairs with a dread in his heart. It had taken so much courage to face Tom and Sabine, could he meet other people too? Nine years away from everyone, he wasn’t to be blamed. He just……didn’t look forward to meets and greets. Lord, had fourteen-year-old Adrien heard his present self, he surely would have beaten some sense into the older man.

Knocking on the door, the blonde was so busy mentally prepping himself for the impromptu meet that he didn’t notice the red blur of hair that suddenly embraced him with full force.

_**“OOOF!”** _

“Don’t. You. Dare. Ooof. Me. Sunshine!!”, the red-haired blur, known by all as Alya Cesaire, exclaimed. “Where for the sake of all things magical had you vanished?? Do you know how worried we all were for you? After, after, after…….”

“Shh babe, it is all good. We all are finally together. That’s the best.”, Nino, his (former?) best bud said, as he hugged the girl from behind, prying her off the speechless blonde.

The meet and greet was, well, better than what he expected. Meeting old friends did ease his worries. But seeing one blue-black haired guitarist made Adrien rediscover some of the teenage jealousy he believed to have died as soon as his lady became truly his.

But what really moved him was the song Luka played. Everyone found those few strums of the guitar as a beautiful melody. “ ** _A wonderful melody that lies unfinished. Maybe forever_** ”, the guitarist himself said. To others, it might seem the guitarist gave up working on that little piece. But a certain blonde knew the real truth.

The melody was so pure, so true, so innocent, so brave and selfless, so _her_. It healed him, made him look through those happy memories again, and then, made him realise how his life changed from the moment he got that silver yet magical ring in a Chinese box. Or maybe from the time when bluebell eyes clashed with emerald green for the first time, entangling him not only in her yo-yo string, but also her charm and love.

* * *

Walking along the Seine, Adrien made a firm resolution. No matter what happens, he would NOT walk to the Pont des Arts bridge. Nuh-uh. He was sure, his heart cou-

" _My name is André! André! Glacé! The sweetheart matchmaker! With one scoop or two, I'll find up for you with magical ice-cream flavors!_ "

Damn. Fate has such a funny way of bringing things into play.

_“Another ice-cream thanks to Mr. Ramier, milady. Seriously, my dietician is gonna freak out about how I am gaining these extra carbs from a carbohydrate-free diet!”  
_

_“Oh! Never knew my kitty was training to keep himself fit.”  
_

_“Well, I am a cat with many secrets, Buginette. But I would love to share some with you.”  
_

_“Easy kitty. You know, no identity reveals. Anyways, you are right. Seems like Hawkmoth is desperate enough to reakumatize Mr. Ramier for uhh…. I lost count after thirty-five.”  
_

_“Geez. At this rate, he is gonna be named the Pigeon-man of Paris. Maybe France. Who knows? The entire world?!”_

Who says only couples can have Andre’s sweetheart ice-cream? And then again, he was a taken guy.

_"Strawberry with black chocolate chip! Blackberries for her hair, and blueberry ice- cream just like her sky-blue stare!"_

Looking down the bridge at the Seine, the blonde remembered his first concert that he had had there with the Kitty Section. His eyes travelled along the railings and…..

Voila! There it was!

Hidden among an array of multi-coloured locks, the special lock of the Lucky Duo of Paris. The yin and the yang, the cat and the ladybug. Red with green polka dots, one of a kind. Just like those who locked it there.

  
He fondly remembered that Valentine’s day. The kiss they had shared as they locked the symbol of their eternal love to the bridge. The fireworks display behind the lit-up Eiffel Tower, their second home. But he remembered the most the love, the adoration, the happiness in those bluebell eyes of his coccinelle….the love and adoration for him, a meagre alley cat who basked in her presence.

* * *

Getting out of the pharmacy, Adrien made his way to the local coffee shop. He had seen posters of UMS 7, and instantly was reminded of how a certain bluenette had handed him his butt on a silver platter multiple times when it came to gaming. Yeah, he had a few victories in his share too, but uhm,

_“You cheated by distracting me! You are too distracting to handle while playing!”_

Well, whatever.

The girl at the counter smiled at him. “The usual two bitter coffees, sir?”

Ah….bitter coffee.

_“Purr-incess!!! What about you? If not you, then what about me? Who will I cuddle with to sleep if you keep working all night?”  
_

_“Nuh-uh chaton, no pulling up the kitty eyes with me. I need to finish this project. It is due-“  
_

_“Next Wednesday. And you already completed like 75% of it! Come on, pleaseee?”  
_

_“Last time, I paw-mise. And I won’t sleep on my workdesk I swear!”  
_

_Yet, the next morning, he would be the one to wake a truly exhausted designer up from her workdesk and give her her regular dose of bitter caffeine while he himself savoured his sweet delight._

“Uh, sir?”

“Ah! Sorry. Make it one bitter and one sweet please. With extra sugar.”

* * *

With the sun setting behind him as pink clouds floated in the sky, Adrien finally arrived to his destination.

_Her_.

The grass was damp, yet the homely feeling it gave, it was just....unmatchable. He felt safe, wanted, loved. Just like those past old days.

Reaching the solitary elm, away from everyone else, he settled himself down in front of her. This place, in the lap of nature, with chirping birds and her favorite flowers, had been their meeting place for the last nine years. A place no one, not even their parents or friends, knew about, it was their tiny precious secret, just the two of them. And as usual, she sat there, waiting for him with open arms and her precious smile and laughter. She was the light of his darkness, the beautiful morning of his endless night, the Miraculous Ladybug to his Chat Noir.

He sat down gently, laying the purple pansies and roses down beside her.

"Here milady, these flowers brought to you by your alley cat along with your signature mask to adorn your beauty. And your favorite bitter coffee. I don't know why you still like it, and yeah, I admit I developed a taste for it too...but nope, today I have my sweet delight with me. Ha! Sweetness always wins hearts, whether you agree or not, my cupcake."

A gentle breeze brushed his cheek, making him smile. "You liked those pics and the kiss, Bugaboo? I am glad. I brought these today. Our last few memories..." Saying so, he placed the lucky charm, the scarf and the derby hat beside the game controller that had laid there as it is for three years. And then, beside the beautiful stone, he laid the first symbol of their love, the black umbrella.

His hand brushed against the hard stone, over the soft words written over it.

_"Hair as dark as night, her pretty bluebell eyes,_

_Used to wonder who she was, beneath that strong disguise._

_Everyday we met each other, and one day she became mine._

_Together our love is so true, here lies my Valentine."_

Eyes wet with emotions, the blonde reached with a shaky hand for the heart-shaped card, the one he still carried with him till date. It was the epitome of her love for him, the only memory of her sweet voice that he held fast to.

_"Your hair shines like the sun, your eyes a gorgeous green._

_I look at you and wonder, your innermost thoughts and dreams._

_Yes, your Valentine I would be, together our love would be so true._

_And for eternity, my heart belongs to you."_

My heart belongs to you...

..heart belongs to you..

..belongs to you...

* * *

**_  
__"_** CHAT!! Snap out of it!!"

But he couldn't.

His world was falling apart.

Literally.

There lay, Emilie Agreste, his Mom, in a glass coffin...

"I am doing this for my wife, all I want is to make her come back. And that can be done only by the Ultimate Wish. Mayura... she is down because of the same curse of the peacock brooch that makes Emilie lie here. And I will do anything for my son!"

Long lost Emilie Agreste...

...Wife of Gabriel Agreste, who was also the supervillain of Paris....

...and Father to the Parisian superhero, the wielder of black luck, Chat Noir...

..as in himself.

_Was bad luck supposed to be this bad?_

The next events, total blur. His messed up thoughts, Ladybug's continued assurances and tries to get him in fight.

But who could have managed a fight after such a revelation?

All he remembered was him and Marinette lying detransformed on the ground, as Fath- **HAWKMOTH!** put on the earrings and the ring. Calling on the ultimate power, there was a flash and then...

...where Hawkmoth once stood now stood an ethereal being. Black and white like the yin and the yang.

"WHAT DO YOU DESIRE? DO YOU KNOW THAT YOUR WISH HAS A PRICE? THIS IS A FOREBODING! THINK BEFORE YOU STEP!!"

"I, Gabriel Agreste, desire for the return of my wife, Emilie Agreste. And for her return, I am willing to pay any price!"

"SO SHALL IT BE!"

There was a bright flash, and Adrien heard a distinctive " _ **NO!**_ " before he felt something.

It was...

...tiredness. Extreme tiredness. Like he wanted to sleep. And never wake up.

But someone was there waiting for him. Someone who was calling out to him.

"-IEN! OPEN YOUR EYES, YOU SILLY CAT! ADRIEN!!!"

Bluebell gaze filled his view, reducing his tiredness a bit. His eyes flitted over to see Marinette holding the shining black-white ribbon connected to him, as she...glowed?

Were normal people supposed to glow?

_Wait...what was happening?!_

Everything started making sense as the ribbon coiled around his girlfriend, removing his tiredness instantly as she fell into his lap, her eyes drowsy with sleep.

"Mi-Milady? Buginette? Purr-incess?"

She softly cupped his cheek,"You mean the world to me, mo-mon chaton. No matter what happens, I will be th-there for you. Always and forev-ever. Be it as a bre-breeze, as a melody, as a hap-happy tear you get from our memory."

"No, no, no. This- This can't be...NO! Why? _Why?_ _**WHY??**_ "

"You deserve th-this happy lif-life Chat-rien. You deserve this."

"Bu-But..."

"Shhh kitty. Your la-lady ain't leaving you. I will alw-always be there, waiting...on the other side. Toge-Together our love, so true, so pure...My heart fur-ever belongs..to you only, mon chaton. Just you. Je t'aime kitty. I, Lad-ladybug, decla-are Adr-adrien Agreste as th-the new gu-guardian of the mira-raculous box."

A flash, a thunder....but he didn't mind them. His lady was here, in pain, slipping away from him.... no, she-she had to know that, that no matter what, he, he...

"Je-je t'aime milady, je t'aime."

 _But his words fell on deaf ears...._ **  
**

* * *

"You know milady? Paris didn't just lose her Ladybug that day. She also lost her black cat. But not in one go..."

Leaning against the stone, Adrien looked up at the now inky black sky as he sipped his coffee. "They say a Ladybug lives short and lucky, the black cat grieves her parting for nine lives. She takes her last breath, happily, in his arms, and he takes his last breath, gloomily, in his memories of her."

"These nine years, they have been hell milady. I tried...I swear I tried. To find love, to find comfort in the family that...that you gifted me, while...ruining yours. I tried to pacify myself that you were there with me, your soul living on inside my mom...but I—I just can't. There's no true love out here, everyone's selfish. You were the only one who made my world colorful, my love meaningful."

I don't belong here, but had to spend these all without you by my side. Luck of a black cat." He chuckled mirthlessly.

He gazed over the amount of things scattered there. All brought by him, each a symbol of their short yet miraculous love story.

"But our memories kept you company, right?"

"They say I am depressed. They say I need help. They tell me to go out, mingle with people and find love! Bullshit! Everything's bullshit!"

The man scoffed. "Gabriel Agreste, Hawk Moth, the man who murdered you and the man who.. sadly by blood...is my Father — he says that I should move on. I should move on! Ha! Now that is what you call as the epitome of hypocrisy!"

"The Great Guardians may have taken the miraculous away, but that doesn't change the reality of you being the Ladybug to my Black Cat, 'Nette. And after you were gone, I—"

He sighed, before swirling his coffee mug and taking in a big sip.

"Every year, I lost one life. Starting from that fateful day. My first life....already gone with you. And guess what milady? The nine years end **today**."

Gazing at his coffee mug, he thought of Tom, Sabine, Alya, Nino, his friends...his mom, his....no. His father was not there. All that remained was Hawkmoth. The murderer of the love of his life, the selfish man who was the shell of his father. Would they miss him?

Well, seeing him here with the prescription of sleeping pills, it won't take a genius to decipher what happened....

As eternal sleep started to do its magic on him, Adrien laid himself on the grass beside his love, toppling over the bitter coffee mug. Watching the brown liquid seep through the grass to the raven-haired beauty lying peacefully six feet beneath, the blonde finally succumbed to the magic of the peaceful sleep, dreaming of bluebell gazes and starry skies spent above the entire city of love.

* * *

Dark clouds loomed overhead, the sharp flashes of thunder and the melodious pitter- patter of the rain surrounding him...

...but this time, the rain didn't bring him any joy. For he was left alone, stranded in the rain and the gloom.

Stretching his hand out to feel the rain, the boy muttered, "Luck of a black cat."  
"Nullified by a cocinelle", a sweet voice replied.

Shocked emerald met ecstatic bluebell as something old, yet miraculous re blossomed in the air..

"Mi-milady?"

"I told you chaton, I would be waiting for you."

He looked at the black umbrella she held between them two. The symbol of their eternal love.

"You and me against the world, Purr-incess?"

"Forever and always my prince, Forever and always."

* * *

**Author's Note:**

> Story also shared on my [Main tumblr](https://mininoire.tumblr.com/) and [Writing Tumblr](https://noirewrites.tumblr.com/).
> 
> If you are looking for a friendly MLB community to discuss your ideas, plots or share views regarding the show, or to simply be a part of a MLB server, join the [Miraculous Fanworks Discord server](https://discord.gg/mlfanworks) today!


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